Ah Ping

2012-02-04T16:34:00.002+08:00

Teehee!
Slept till 2pm and I feel soooo refreshed!
And I managed to re-edit my CSC Thesis proposal till it's 490words!
(From 500words to 483 words and after adding 7 fullstops, it reached 490words!)

I'm feeling happy yo!:D

2012-02-04T01:07:00.002+08:00

Things I Do in school to keep myself awake:
1. ask my fwens to pinch me
2. borrow hairclip from kamin to pinch myself awake
3. ask sweets from ahgan
4. keep moving to prevent myself from dozing off
5. just concuss.

Things I do at home to keep myself awake
1. Poke myself with pins and pens
2. Drink plenty of tea
3. Watch videos on Youtube and do work after feeling motivated
4. THROW MY PENS AND JUST CONCUSS!!

I dunnoe why I'm so tired; It's like I didn't do much and still I feel tired.
I feel tired and sick when I feel stress. But it's sth everyone should get used to.
Jiayou!

2012-02-02T23:51:00.003+08:00

I was reminded of what a fwen told me:
有利用价值的人生才是有意义的人生，没有了利用价值就等于失去了人生之意。。。。。。
I dunnoe what exactly leads me to this kinda of thoughts, I supposed It's just what I get from observing the environment, observing the surrounding and observing the people.

I'm starting to believe in this sentence, given the state of our pragmatic society:
Would you want to continue living, feeling useless everyday or feeling a sense of redundancy or would you rather live like a ghost? This kinda thoughts kinda disturbing, but,
ah wells, sometimes, ac rly does aid one from pollution though:/
I'm not sure if this kinda stuffs is only applicable to certain regions or certain areas, but definitely, it's sth that's happening everyday.

It's upsetting when no matter how much you tried to put youself into other people's shoes and you still can't agree with their mentality and actions because of your own principles.
Sometimes, I just can't cross my border of my own principles.

Nope, not in an emo state, I'm a happy person to start with. I'm definitely happy(:
*Smile*
I love my life, truly. I guess I'm just getting older.

On a hind note, I've found out some Uni courses that are pretty suitable for me, and I'm definitely interested in these courses.
加油吧！(:

p.s.
This baby really makes me happy.
In fact I'm motivated to sleep earlier because of her(:
<3

2012-01-31T17:36:00.002+08:00

I must be a troublemaker.
LOL.

18一朵凋零的花.

You can't expect everyone to be the same.
我就是这样，So what can you do?

2012-01-28T18:16:00.004+08:00

Read Ahgan's post and I find it very reflective..
What will I do 1o years later?..

"I enjoy talking to my students and preparing for lessons. This reminds me of the old days of attending lectures and tutorials with my fwens and going home tgt with them. I miss laughing like mad when running on the track! I miss joking with my fwens and laughing at every silly little things. I miss wearing uniform! It's no wonder many said that studying is better than working. After all, humans tend to miss the past when it's gone. Dun get me wrong, I love my job bcos I love interacting with children/teenagers, I like it when they finally see the light after listening to my advice, I love the smiles on their faces when they understood my lessons. I like it when I'm able to make a difference in these kids' lives. Life is meaningful and fulfilling(: Of course, I have other plans in life other than being a teacher. I believe that everyone needs a change of environment aft some time so I'm going to work hard to earn money and invest in my parents' mini eatery place and help them!:D I might immerse myself in the art scene in Singapore and get a new career related to DIY/arts/Innovation. I love arts! Arts as in 艺术。
I'm going to take in god-daughter from my brother bcos I dun rly trust guys:X Did you hear the bell? It just rang! I'm off for my next lesson!:D"

This is what I imagined my life 10years later. Haha!(:
AhGan's post rly makes me think of what I rly want to do in the future!
Of course, these plans are ambiguous and tentative and prone to changes.
After all, 世上唯一不变的东西是不停的改变。
I think I'm those fickle-minded type of ppl, so I wouldn't rly 执着于what I think I want to do.
Well, let's just let nature takes its course bah!
I believe humans can do anything they want so long as they're willing to do so!:D
My responsibility now is just to work hard(:
...

On a hind note, I supposed it's true that 在不同的年龄层由不同的想法，I hate it when I feel so old and I abhor it when I started thinking as if I'm like a grown-up.
Did I mention that I hate adults? Bcos they like to make easy things complicated and seek trouble for themselves. They value pride over happiness.

Well, I'm gonna be an adult soon someday, so 我不愿置评太多。

This is babyberry! My new baby! As in, my bdae gift from my bro! Actl, I wanted to buy her a long time ago, but I've got no $ so I aborted the idea! Thanks to my bro, I finally have her! I hug her to sleep every night! Dun worry, my other babies are not jealous at all(This makes me very glad)! XP
They love their new sister and shower her with lots of love!
I think I sleep better now bcos she's very furry!XP
LOL. I should stop being crazy!:D

p.s. ARGHHH! I hate it when my post is sooooooooo reflective. As in, I dun rly like sharing my thoughts with ppl! No Wonder ppl says 水瓶座很冷漠。As in, I find it weird sharing my personal thoughts with ppl! I promise, I'll try my best to make sure this kinda thought-sharing session won't happen agn!(:

2012-01-28T00:16:00.002+08:00

I was so tired for this week that I went to bed immediately aft my late lunch at 5pm.
Woke up at 9pm instead of 6.30pm even though I had set my alarm!
I swear I didn't hear any alarm ringing even though I rly set my mobile phone's alarm!
I guess I was too tired.

我不能因为小挫折就闷闷不乐！不能放弃！谁没有失败过？
I also started by failing, so what are these minor setbacks to me?
Obstacles and failures are there to train me to be a more responsible learner, and I ought to appreciate these obstacles and failures with a more open and a gracious heart.
I shouldn't whine about sufferings and hardships and stuffs.
These so-called "hardships" wouldn't be called "hardships" if I appreciate and learn from my mistakes.
There must be a reason behind everything. I must enjoy what I'm doing!

LOL. I finally see the light today(:

2012-01-26T23:25:00.002+08:00

Adjectives to describe this month: Sleepy, Tired, Hectic, headache, Stress, Crazy, Annoying & etc.

I just can't keep up w e pace of the CSC lesson.

I've never like CSC. I dun even noe what kinda subject is that!
CSC just makes me feel that I'm stupid.

And I failed the CSC essays assignments which I stayed up till 4.15am every CNY break to chiong!

Why am I even aiming for sth so not-realistic?

2012-01-23T01:24:00.004+08:00

我不会做CSC ESSAYS！！！ -> Killer.
There's 3 CSC essays in total!!
So I stared at the 3 qns and they stared at me, I can literally hear them laughing at my stupidity.

I haven't do CLL hw!
I haven't complete Econs tutorial!!

So, 你们以为CLEP很简单meh?
We also have our own problems and stuffs to study.
Who says Chinese dun need to study? Who says it's chicken feet? Screw you man!

Ahhh!
Okay! Okay! I must Jiayou! I must enjoy doing those hw! I must enjoy studying!

我可以不去拜年吗?

oh ya, Happy Chinese new year!

This is my new plant.
She taught me that growing up can be full of curiousity and exciting bcos of new experiences gained from doing lots of stuffs and learning new things in the process; however growing up can be painful and excruciating bcos if we're not careful enough, we'll lose things we never want to lost, we'll get hurt if we're too persistent, and that growing up is an inevitable of our lives.

Alright, I'll embrace the growing stress as a form of strength bah! What doesn't kills you makes you stronger! (Sounds so familiar).

p.s. 不念不变。

2012-01-21T22:26:00.002+08:00

Chapter1:
Went Out in the Morning with ZhaoJun!!!!:DD
'Cos We'd made a promise to go out tgt!:D
Went Bugis to take neoprints!:D (I look like an animate character! haha!)
Went Bugis street to buy stuffs!:D Teeehee! Ate Ice-Cream!
ZJ totally knows her way arnd the place! And I went like "WOW!"

Chapter2:
It was raining by the time ZJ and I went back to JP.
Had another meet-up with a Junior for sth, but then I lost my way:(
Honestly, I dunnoe how to get to the Opp of an Overhead bridge at the Jurong Central Park, bcos My sense of direction rly CMI. I felt super helpless for 30+min and my junior and her parent had to wait for me:X
Sorry!
That's when I felt super useless.. I just felt confused!
If not for Abigail, I dun think I can find the place.

Chapter3:
Abi, XN and I were supposedly going to go for a jog at 5.30pm, but then I was late, plus it was raining damn heavily. But Abi told me XN waited for us for so long that she got so angry that she doesn't want to jog anymore, so only the both of us are going to jog.
*queue up at 154 to board the bus*
Abi suddenly changed her mind about not jogging cos she got somehow pissed and it was raining and suggested dinner instead.
Me: *Horrified, freaked-out, sad look* cos I thought I got into trouble:( I called XN to apologize but she said she wasn't angry but busy!
LOL. I was so freaked-out that I kinda Emo!
But then Abi walked into Swensen when she wanted to have her dinner at Burger King!
That's when I saw XN, YL & Sandra and realised I was tricked!
I was dumbfounded!
haha.
Thank you girls for the advanced bdae celebration and everything!
And the compass -.-'''
Love you girls!:D

Conclusion:
Really thank everyone who made my supposedly gloomy saturday a more livelier and happier one!

2012-01-19T19:02:00.001+08:00

Many Many homework ah!
Ahhhhh!~
Nehmind! Ah Ping Chiong Chiong Chiong!:D

2012-01-18T18:41:00.003+08:00

oh ya! Happy Birthday to my mum!:D

I'm supposed to be born on my mum's bdae= same bdae as mum..
But well, I was a lazy baby who refused to get out of my mum's womb.

妈妈万岁！:D

2012-01-18T18:21:00.003+08:00

I need to stop being mean, I need to stop being sarcastic,
I need to stop showing attitude, I need to stop whinning,
I need to stop being too straightforward with my words.

OMG. Today, I realised I'm a super 坏人。
For every single thing that I'm not happy about, I'll make a super negative comment.

Okay, shall shuddup and be a 好人.

I needa behave like a 17 going on 18.

I hate this, but let's face the fact. Everyone needa be more mature.

2012-01-15T00:53:00.003+08:00

Okay, great. Reached home at 11pm bcos I had some CCA CIP concert from 3pm to 10pm:((
Damn tired! Not done with my CSC essays and revision for tests!
*see the emphasis on the letter "s"?*

I feel so damn messed-up.
Whatever.

I got so tired I used Body shower gel as Shampoo and Shampoo as body shower gel!
I nearly used toothpaste for my face!
That's what you get for bathing at 12am.

Anw, was rly damn sad during CCA CIP concert:((
So sad I nearly cry:(((((( (dunwan think about it)
Firstly, It took up my precious time,
Secondly... why I shaln't elaborate here:((

2012-01-14T12:39:00.003+08:00

Regretted staying at home to do hw on the weekend;
That means I'll have to blast the music up several notches to segregate myself from the unnecessary arguments that can upset me.

Insanity on the lease, and I meant it in a negative way.
I feel myself landing in a landmine- one step is all it takes for a painful death.

Whatever.
Welcome to Shitland, dear Me.

Shut up and Keep to yourself; it works- most of the time.

2012-01-13T22:36:00.002+08:00

Horrible week.
一波未平，一波又起。

p.s. Why this kinda stuffs keep happening?

2012-01-09T17:08:00.002+08:00

First day of school and I'm down with gastric pain:(

Gastric pain not bcos I didn't eat or anything (I've been consciencious to prevent myself from going hungry or doing work on empty stomach for a long time 'cos I was told that prolonged gastric issues leads to cancer; yeah, scared of death aft that horrible nightmares),
instead I guess it's cos of the sudden irregular hour that I'm eating my breakfast at, plus the food I ate was super spicy (okay, maybe I'm just so not-used to spicy stuffs).
Mainpoint: Spicy food is :S and gastric pain is Painful!

On top of that, I ran to board that bus 185 (that comes at 7.05am) so I won't be late for school with a heavy tummy of breakfast.
I'm super scary, it's either I don't eat or I'll eat a lot at one go.
Mainpoint: Running for bus is super NOT COOL! LOL

Whatever.

First day of school and I volunteered to be GP rep! Teehee! *Brimming with glee*
I'm obviously up to no good. *Troll face*

Okay, alright, I came online td bcos td was a bit "free-er".
It won't be tmr. (I have a crystal ball!)
And, as I've mentioned in my previous post, I won't be coming online with the exception of using mobile phone.
So...
Mainpoint: Don't miss me too much!<3

p.s. I found the song that I like THANKS TO ABIGAIL!!:D THANKYOU AH!:D

I miss the old DBSK... <3

2012-01-07T17:20:00.002+08:00

Right, so school's starting on Monday.
This implies that I can't online for most of the time, with the exception of using my mobile phone.
Hmmm... Let's hope for the best!(:

Anw, I think I've reached the optimum level for my CSC Thesis proposal alrd!
I've got an extra 25 words I needa cut down on, but there's simply nowhere to cut them at all!
Let's hope I'm given the leeway:X

And! There's like Tests(Econs and maths) before CNY!
*faint*
Alrd, alrd, Thou shalt stop whinning for now!
Jiayou!!

2012-01-06T19:10:00.002+08:00

上的山多终遇虎;
Truly understand this after I "have sth on" for not attending CCA for so many time.
Kay, I went to sch from 11.30am-4pm for CCA td
cos the tcher SMS me PERSONALLY!
Wanted to "I have sth on" agn td, but then, well, 老师看出我的臭pattern le:X

我不是故意不来的，but seriously, anybody who's been in this kinda "nonsense" before will truly understand what I meant. (Right Kamin?)

*Sigh* I kinda stopped practising my instrument alrd bcos there's not enuff time to do so &
I kinda feel demoralised le:(
Dun get me wrong, I totally like 柳琴，but I think at this point of time, academic overwrites EVERYTHING.

Yeah, A Level this year.
I MUST JIAYOU.
WE MUST JIAYOU!

Anw, I kinda clean-up my room (as in my area),
我的臭pattern 又发了， bought a big green plastic storage box and just clear the unsightly mess away. Recycled piles of papers.
Well, after clearing-up, I supposed it's quite a good effort le!(:
'Cos I actl 自动地 clean-up by myself!^_^v

Teehee!:D

2012-01-05T20:52:00.003+08:00

放了很多人的鸽子，让我非常愧疚。
I burst their bubbles.
I'm sorry.

I'll make sure I get my priorities right, so I won't disappoint anyone,
So I dun have to make anyone wait for me, so I won't 放人鸽子。

.....
Okay, whatever, Let's try to be happy okay!
I'm a happygirl94(:

*Smile*
(:

2012-01-01T00:24:00.003+08:00

Happy 2012.
Let's hope this year will turn out fine(:
*Push up specs*

2011-12-31T21:28:00.003+08:00

Last day of 2011.

Spend my day with the ah saos @ harbourfront centre and VIVO today(:

I thank god for letting me meet wonderful people, wonderful fwens who made 2011 a more memorable and endurable one for me(:
I thank my fwens who still stand by me whenever I needed help(:
I thank my family for enduring with my shitty attitude(:

17years old or rather 2011 made me experience a lot of "first time(s)"
I thank everyone for giving me an unforgettable memories.

May everyone be blessed with a wonderful year(2012) ahead!

p.s. 明天就是明年了。

//I really really really really really like YongHwa from CNBlue. I've never like a kpop idol so madly in my life before. LOL.
Sadly, He's so popular, and there're so many ppl in love with him, I can only see him from afar.
HAHA! Just random thought(:
I honestly think YongHwa's better than Bae SooBin and JaeJoong.

2011-12-29T21:13:00.001+08:00

I did something evil today:(

Repenting-in-progress.

2011-12-29T00:51:00.003+08:00

I ought to kill myself.
I couldn't resist the temptation to slack,
I thought It's totally alright if I take a break for a day or so?
And ended up I totally lost my momentum FOR DAYS,
drenched in the pursuit of "joy" from entertainment.

And the weird dreams are forever bugging me in my sleep.

One thing I did right last week:
Spending the whole of my christmas eve at Lee Kong Chian Lib to do my thesis proposal and the whole of my Christmas to finish it up.
Results:
The teacher finally thinks my Proposal is okay! (Though there's some flaws which I need to touch up on)

Things to note:
1. No Slacking
2. No Excuses
3. No Whinning/Complaining
4. 不要读小说！
5. No drama!

I MUST ENDURE!

p.s. Of all 小说， why the depressing ones?
LOL and, I needa buy a NEW DIARY WITH PASSWORD!

2011-12-27T20:12:00.003+08:00

我会宣战。
Don't you effing irritate me. You blardy idiot.

p.s. Hate being sooo vulgar, but that's just so me if you trigger my limit.

2011-12-26T23:08:00.003+08:00

I had a weird dream last night.

I dreamt that I Died.
And God revived me for only one day to spend with my family, to tell them that I'm going to die again the next day. I have 24hours of life-- and that's all.
My parents were extremely sad; My dad tried to control his agony and my mum cried.
For the first time in my life, I'm scared of death. I didn't know the consequences. I didn't know what will happen. I didn't know anything.
I was told to go back to sleep, because I'm dying soon, and the most beautiful way of dying, is dying in your dream/sleep.
I couldn't resist the overwhelming sadness in me, so I woke up again in the middle of the night, knocking at my house's door (I don't know how I managed to get out of house, it's just so weird), crying to my parents to take a family picture together, so they'll remember me for life, So I'll never be forgotten. So I cried and cried like no tmr.

And suddenly, my hp's alarm rang!
I woke up! So I've got no idea what happened in the end to my dream.

I don't know if this is a nightmares or what. I'm having weird dreams EVERY NIGHT for the past few nights.
I supposed, I've been giving myself unnecessary pressure?

Lesson learnt from my dreams: Treasure your life.

...........................................................................................................................................................
Went out with the SOTS td! (Kepei and Leecheng were absent!) :((
Ate lunch: Witnessed an epic scene in the foodcourt at Bugis Junction!:
Soup Spilled on girl...
Boy: Your PHONE Okay?
Girl: ... ...
Me: @.@!?!

Took neoprints: Eyes big like OMG;
Went bugis street: Throngs of humans sia! O.O!?!
Went Orchard's kinokuniya for books: SUPER TIRED YET SUPER HAPPY COS OF MY BBJX! Dinner @ Wisma.
Train-ed home!

Was really excited to go out with them!:D 'Cos it's been a long time(I supposed?) since we meet up!

The most memorable age of my life so far:
14, 15 and 17(:

17 Because I met the Sots and that's the best thing that has had ever happened to me and
17 because I'm still continuing my friendship with my sec sch bestfwen(:

May our friendships last(:

2011-12-25T00:12:00.003+08:00

Though this year really doesn't have any Christmas atmosphere for me,
I'm thankful for what I have(: Thankyou God.

Thank you Abi &hawflake for the Christmas gifts!(:
I really appreciate it! <3
我真的很乖！你们说等到圣诞节时才能打开礼物，我真的有做到哦！
My favourite baby pink and cherry pink and the stuffs I really need!
你们还记得我喜欢的颜色(':

And also, really appreciate the friends who still send well wishes to me(:
我真的好想念你们噢！
Really, Miss all the fun time and craziness we had...
*sigh*

For those who made a difference in my life-- make me happy and etc, really thankyou(:

p.s. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

2011-12-23T20:26:00.002+08:00

I feel so tired, after barely touching 3 sub topics.
I swear I'm half-way into lala land when typing this post.

And I've got no Christmas mood this year.
It was never like that. lol. It doesn't matter I guess.

Guess I'll have to spend my Chirstmas eve doing Thesis @Lee Kong Chien (?) Reference Library @ bugis tmr with the rest.

And I kinda realised I should never wish for anything because my wishes never come true.

p.s. Really nth exciting for me to post about these few weeks. So sorry for my boring posts.
oh ya! I'm going to collect my old version of 《步步惊心》 soon! That's the ONLY thing that keeps me anticipating for this week.

这几个星期真没什么开心的事.

2011-12-20T23:04:00.002+08:00

Celebrated Sandra's Birthday officially, after 4 years
Gave her bedsheets! To tell her that we're always with her!(:
Abigail's Idea! Super creative!:D
......

感概那短暂的韶光。
Had a mini conversation over phone and texts with a primary+secondary sch fwen.
我们怎么开始说话都那么老气？
The mini talk about future； Mine seems kinda bleak.
有时原以为吾属于某个领域，但比想象中还要复杂。
有许多感概，但此处不便多说。

p.s. I think my eyesight worsened le, having blurry vision even with my current specs. Everything seems so dark even though I switched on the lights. ahhhh!

2011-12-18T12:43:00.002+08:00

Okay, I promised, This shall be my last post on 《步步惊心》!
I finally finished watching that drama!
真是扣人心弦，as the episodes 越接近大结局，the plots just got more and more depressing.
My eyes were brimming with tears-- But, I did not cry.

It then dawned on me that 能使人产生共鸣的故事往往是一个凄凉的故事--没有好的结局，也没有交代的未来，是留给读者/观众去思考的。

It's just so depressing.
For the rest of the holiday, I would not touch any drama on my lappy.

p.s. And I kinda realised, my posts can never be in full English, neither can it be in full chinese;
to put it nicely, I'm effectively bilingual, to say the plain truth, I can't switch effectively between the two languages:( I ought to change this stupid bad habit of mine:(

2011-12-17T17:27:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday to my brother!:D

p.s. 除了歉意以外，还有愧疚之心。

2011-12-16T21:56:00.005+08:00

The Ideal Guy:

《步步惊心》的十三阿哥

我不是发花痴，只是觉得剧中的他真的英俊潇洒，风度翩翩，文武双全，品行高尚，重视手足之情，讲义气，无野心，有本事，豪迈，爽直，认真。
可说是苦尽甘来啊！

p.s. I promised to be serious, I promised not to slack.

And my brother's bdae's tmr!!

Happy advanced birthday to my bro!:D

2011-12-14T22:33:00.002+08:00

看了《步步惊心》不禁有些感概：
人总是那么奇怪，明知前面有火，却还要扑上去，只为了可能会有的温暖。。。。。。

On a hind note, I've spotted abt 2-3 loopholes in 《步步惊心》! haha!
That isn't the point, my point is, the drama arouse my interests in qing history,
I'm glad to know a bit of qing history through the drama.

But then again, 自古以来，胜者是英雄，败者是篡逆者;
we can never really know the truth behind history, it has always been this case: the winner writes the history.
History is written by the mankind afterall.
Humans never know the truth, we are blinded by what we call the "facts".
Just because it's written down and printed, doesn't mean everything is the truth that we want to know.

p.s. 朕 is in a 《步步惊心》 mood.

2011-12-12T22:59:00.004+08:00

Okay, Basically, I'm wasting my time away not doing anything productive at home.
(See, That's what it's like to "study" at home; there's just too much entertainment)

Currently watching 《步步惊心》; Sad to say, I'm still on episode 14 despite watching that show the minute I woke up this morning:(

Why 《步步惊心》?
Reason 1: 'Cos Dawn said It's nice.
Reason 2: I couldn't find the Thai drama that I watched during my stay in China's hotels (No, I'm not kidding, It's a Thai drama I'm looking for)
Reason 3: There's a book on 《步步惊心》 and I want to read it!!
Reason 4: It's my favourite genre of drama! 古装/穿越/言情
Reason 5: 'Cos I fell in love with the OST

p.s. I needa start doing something productive, needa do my work, needa be more hardworking.

2011-12-11T15:26:00.004+08:00

Back from CLEP Overseas Immersion Programme!:D
Had a rly great time with fwens from JJ and other schools:D
ANW, WE EXPERIENCED SNOW FOR 2 DAYS! Lucky us!:D
Though I may miss home sometimes, I'm glad to meet new and crazy fwens!:D　
This 15days is certainly worthwhile! Learning more about China and stuffs out of CLL!
Will upload pics on facebook soon!:D

A short update (okay, maybe not so short after all); there's a shift in the schedule:

26/11(sat): Arrival at Beijing; Waited damn long for陈老师, a china teacher to pick us up; bought bottles of mineral water and many other necessities at the supermarket near 如家酒店

Reflection: Singapore and Beijing is rly damn different; transportation in china like buses and cars and other vehicles are literally speeding and braking at an abrupt speed that sometimes give me chills. People can be seen spitting anywhere, anytime, everywhere; their spitting seems like a competition of distances to me. hmmm... Toilets are also terrible bcos toilet papers cnnt be flushed down the pipe, but instead thrown into a bin near the toilet bowl. The weather there is cold and dry bcos it's winter time!:D Also, ppl in china are rly used to walking long distances, we're practically walking long distances from one place to another place. Can't imagine?
Well, it's like walking from the first bus stop to the 5th ot perhaps the 6th or 7th bus stop in Singapore!

27/11(sun): visited 天坛公园，天安门广场and故宫(my home, jk!)
Reflection: After visiting 天坛公园, I realised elderly in china rly aged gracefully, bcos in parks like china such as 天坛公园, MASSIVE NUMBERS of elderly are gathered tgt to do exercises and games such as china badmintion and etc, I'm guilty to say these elderly are more active than me (they walk longers distances and play better games than me!) And ohh, I had to do 报告 for 天坛公园, my hands were totally cold and numb at the end of the day:'( And the sentence that leaves a great impression in me was“天是圆的，地是方的”, At least that's what the ppl were taught to believe.
天安门广场and故宫 are HUGEEE! Basically, in ancient, ppl believed in symmetrical, whatever appears on the left must also be shown on the right. Interesting. I can say that the planning for 故宫 was well-planned and well thought out(:
and ohh, I took pictures with a CUUTUTTEEE LITTLE BABY GIRL!:DD

28/11(mon): 长城and十三陵
Reflection: I think 十三陵 is very cold:S Kinda 没意义 cos the artefacts aren't real, though the underground holes are. It makes me think a lot though:/ Why are the emperor and the royal family so particular about their tomb and where their bodies are going to lay when they passed away when they should be focusing on making lives for the fellow citizens a better one?
长城 was pretty COOL! Obviously, we couldn't finish climbing, but we tried out best to climb as far and as much as we can! It was fun climbing 长城 with your fwens!:D It's the same way as learning-- learning can be as steep as the steps of 长城, but as long as you endure, everything's gonna be okay!:D

29/11(tues): 参观北京师范大学，参观北京师大二附中。参观胡同，四合院，恭王府。
Reflection: 北京师范大学 is more of a school to train future teachers. 北京师大二附中 dun gives me a good impression.
胡同was nice, I like the design of ancient housing, 四合院 was a combination of 胡同 to form 4 sides of housing (There's ppl living there you know!). 恭王府 was like a mini version of 皇宫 bcos the xxx(xxx bcos I forgot the name) wants everything that the emperor have "皇上有什么，我也要有”. Even though this xxx was absurd, he had his family's welfare at heart by preventing his family from execution from the marriage of his son to the princess.
anw, I LOVE TRISHAW RIDE!

30/11(wed): 专题讲座2：现代小说创作与欣赏@北京师大二附中(lesson), 扎染客 and 国画课。
Reflection: 专题讲座2 opens my eyes to more and good writers I've never known in Singapore! Know some background behind these writers. 扎染客 and 国画课 were fun!:D My 扎染 got nice patterns!!:D and my 国画 rly cui! My painting torn with 2 super awkward and visible holes! Learning point: You need patience in everything you do to do it once and do it right!

1/12(Thurs): 专题讲座一：唐诗@北京师大二附中(lesson), 雍和宫，孔庙，参观奥运广场。
Reflection: 专题讲座一 should focused on a few 唐诗 and teach us how to evaluate qns and 唐诗 instead of talking on MANY 唐诗 with no focus. 雍和宫's like a 藏temple to me, it's amazing how political leaders（满人） made use of religion in the past to win over the favour of 汉人(though ppl still resent the 满人。) 孔庙makes me understand the importance of education in the past and how education can improve your lives; however some scholars failed to understand that “会读书不一定会做人”. People in the past really emphasize a great deal on education.
We took many pictures in 奥运广场, ate macdonald's food, 有种回家的感觉 and sense of familiarity though sg's mac tastes better!
*Forgot to mention that we'd also watched a musical, 两只狗 sth sth, hmm... Indeed, musical in china is oso different from Singapore, interactive actors, interesting plots.

2/12(fri): 随堂听课@北京师大二附中, 专题讲座3：《雪上飞狐》@北京师大二附中(lesson)，参观老舍茶馆
Reflection: 随堂听课was pointless cos we were basically treated like dirt there. 专题讲座3 was awesome! It makes me feel like reading 《雪上飞狐》 all over again! Basically, the lecturer gave us an overview on what she's going to say and elaborate more on critical and more impt points(: 长话短说！好！I enjoyed the show @ 老舍茶馆! And I Bought tealeaf for my dad!:DD

3/12(sat): 游览圆明园，颐和园。
Reflection: Me do report again:( Cold and numb hands! 圆明园 is awesome! 圆明园既是人民的骄傲，也是人民的耻辱。颐和园是慈禧太后的避暑宫殿！It's call summer palace in English!(Duh!) 颐和园was damn cold!

4/12(sun): 参观首都博物馆，逛王府井！
Reflection: 首都博物馆dun leave a deep impression in me:S 王府井 was awesome cos WE BOUGHT LOTS OF BOOKS when others went shopping!!! Bought like 2 heavy stacks of books and spent 人民币６４２．２０. Took public transport (Trains and Bus!) I LIKE IT! (Though the books were damn heavy and my fwens were helping me to carry some of it)

5/12(mon): 专题讲座4：《茶馆欣赏与分析》@北京师大二附中(lesson)，Visit Peking University
Reflection: 专题讲座4 was kinda waste time cos we watched only video and nth much. Peking University 真的好美啊！But I wouldn't consider Peking Uni cos ppl in BeiJing kinda cocky.

6/12(tues): 专题讲座5：《红楼梦》@北京师大二附中(lesson)，参观中国现代文学馆，主题班会与中方学生交流
Reflection: The lecturer was so engaging that I feel like reading 《红楼梦》! 中国现代文学馆display lots of writers! 主题班会与中方学生交流 was successful I supposed? I'll never forget the skit and my role "我要当总统”

７/1２(wed): Fly to Shanghai
Reflection: The plane delayed like shit! Was on the plane sleeping thinking that the plane is taking off soon! after sleeping for 1h plus and waking up! I was shocked to realise that the plane is still on the ground and havent take off yet! Annoying! 复旦大学宾馆was nice!:D I like the place though my room gives me the creeps when it's dark:S

8/12(thurs): lesson in fudan affliated high school on archaeology. 豫园。城隍庙小吃品尝，shopping, 宋庆龄故居，南京路步行，游览外滩
Reflection: Boring archaeology lesson cos it's rly not sth I'm familiar with, dozed off a few min and woke up immediately cos i dunwan to be an embarrassment. Dunnoe wad's going on in 豫园 cos the new tourguide was talking to himself and speeding on his own. OHH, did I mention that ppl in china walk DAMN FAST? Even faster than speed-walker like me!
城隍庙小吃and shopping were awesome! Bargained a lot and Dawn's anchoi face was damn epic! And ppl rly takes great care in preserving 宋庆龄故居! We had to wear 鞋套to get into the place! 南京路步行 rly nth to buy cos everything is so damn expensive! and We went on boat for 游览外滩! Rly neh went on boat for a long time le! Rly enjoyed the cold air breezing by! I love shanghai's night scene!

9/12(fri): 鲁迅纪念馆，田子方，杜沙夫人蜡像馆，参观复旦大学与新加坡留学生交流
Reflection:　鲁迅wrote a lot of books! And he thinks so deep that I doubt I'm able to do it. 田子方was basically a place for ppl to sell their creation and etc, things there are expensive. We took many many pics in 杜沙夫人蜡像馆! heehhehe! I love the ambience in 复旦大学. If I have to choose between Peking Uni and Fudan Uni, I would prefer Fudan Uni!(:

10/12(sat): Visit 东方明珠, Mac for Lunch on Bus and on our way to Airport!
Reflection: 东方明珠's pretty cool!:D

HOME SWEET HOME!:D yay!!

Sorry for the lonnnggg post! Skip it if u want!:D

2011-11-25T16:58:00.003+08:00

Back from packing some stuffs and watching BREAKING DAWN PART 1!!!!
My favourite part of the movie: Jacob's Imprint on Renessmee and Bella's (painful yet silent) change to become a vampire.
I wonder what does it feels like to imprint on someone else, but then again, Imprinting is something I'll never understand because I'm a vampire(a thousand-year-old vampire) XD
hmmm... Wait till I've imprinted on someone else(If that ever happens).
...

On a hindnote, 有点舍不得父母and my family, like the first time leaving them for so long(with the exception of camps).

And I havent complete my holiday assignments and this spells trouble for me!
Well, I'm considering (bcos I might be too lazy to do any work) to bring my stuffs there...

Going to China tmr (26th Nov to 10th Dec: Spending my first 11days in BeiJing and the last 4 days in Shanghai). I want to buy many many books!:DD
希望每一天都开开心心顺顺利利。

Don't miss me people.

p.s. I ain't worth it and I know it.

2011-11-24T20:08:00.000+08:00

AHHHH!~~
I'm still doing 论文！！！
Serves me right for procrastination.
May god bless.

2011-11-23T10:26:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday my dearest 柳琴! You're finally a 1-year-old baby!:'D

...
On a hindnote, I doubt I can complete my tasks le:(
But that's not the point.
My point is ______________________________________________.
But It doesn't matter anymore, does it?

p.s. 我是我在世上见过最糟的人。I must be a better person from now on.

2011-11-20T00:08:00.000+08:00

Another thing.

我下定决心了!(:

p.s. No more No more.

2011-11-19T23:55:00.002+08:00

发了疯了。

Went to Suntec to get Autograph from 九把刀。
Waited for damnnnnn looooonngggggg until I got supeeerrrr hungry and my back ache!
Okay, On one hand I didn't regret going for the autograph session,
but on another hand, I somehow regretted a bit (after looking at my hw and the Thesis's proposal submission deadline, which is sunday night)

And expected, kena scoldings from my mum from buying too many books.
Seriously, It's only 4 books. I dun think I'm buying a lot.
I guess partly bcos I came back late?
Or partly bcos my mum didn't rly want me to go out bah?

Thou shalt go to sleep for now('cos I've got no motivation to do work)

To-Do:
1.)Econs Tutorial 1
2.Maths Revision Package
3.)3 GP Essays
4.)4 GP Articles
5.)CSC Thesis stuff(which can only be completed next year)

hmmm... 应该可以做完吧？

2011-11-17T21:35:00.005+08:00

I feel so farrrrr away from my target of completing my tasks.
The time-table I set up for myself is also screwed! *Sigh*
When can I complete my tasks with my slack attitude?
I seriously cannot get back my momentum:(
.....
Met teacher for Thesis today.
Ended up feeling lost。LOL.
I dun mean anything, but seriously, I did my research [Though I know It's not enough and kinda insufficient and I could have done better and more(quality)...],
and I came to school with high hopes that my worries would be over soon,
instead, I went back home feeling loss/ lack of direction(whatever shit you call that).

Nope, I'm not blaming anyone, I'm just thinking why make sth so complex?
Like why does everything seem so complex?
I mean, it shouldn't be this fed-up/complicated bah?

Thesis is a whole 30%, I dunwan to give up any chance to get A.
我不相信梦想，只相信目标。

Whatever shit. Sorry for the random ranting for those who still read my blog.

I must try my best. Now's not the time to slack (as much as I do feel lazy most of the time)
Jiayou Ahping!

p.s. I needa head down to my fav place <3 everyday if I've got no school to do sth productive!
*Push up specs*

//其实我很怕.

2011-11-14T18:43:00.003+08:00

Ysd:
Went to the Esplanade with the Sots to watch 《记得说再见》.
Free tickets for us 'cos We're from JJC? And the producer or sth happens to be an ex-student of our MT HOD!

剧情发人省醒，梦想可以很美妙，有时就在你眼前，有时却遥不可及;
有时脆弱得经不起压力与现实；
有时却充满热诚与热血（sounds so familiar, 那些年，我们一起追的女孩）。。。。。。
剧中命运愚人，原本暧昧的两人却被分两地，各自又找到了新欢。
从逢时，只能话当年。。。。。。
因为“记得说再见”，才了了心中的遗憾。

Yeap, Nice songs, nice performance and nice actings!
Even the lyrics sounds so meaningful Suddenly.

And I met my Sec sch chinese teacher there! My sec1 to 3 CL cum HCL tcher!
Was really glad to meet her!
She's a teacher that gave me a lot of 启发。
她相信我的实力与努力，给我很大的鼓励。
Haiyo! I know how to scold ppl very well, but I seriously dunnoe how to praise ppl!
She's rly a nice tcher and as far as I can rmb, I would rather not do my chem/bio/phy hw to do chinese hw, I would rather flunk sciences and maths than to flunk chinese.
In any case, I would awaes try my best to get the highest marks for chinese bcos I dunwan to disappoint a teacher who (still have) high hopes on me.
I would rly listen to lesson when the others dun.
I like Chinese lessons and I like reading Chinese books(:

Td:
Went to my fav lib to do hw and read 《雪山飞狐》
In any case, 我死期快到了! Havent even finish reading that book!(I'd watched that show alrd!)

Okay, Thou shalt not waste time.
Off to makan!(:

2011-11-12T19:42:00.003+08:00

-Edited ('cos I dun like Emo AhPing *Draw circles*)-

Okay, Maybe I'm sorry for being selfish and apathetic.
But dun 欺人太甚。
我不说话不是因为我好欺负，我只是在忍而已。
I dunnoe how long I can endure these craps.
Dun force me into a corner, bcos One day, I'll retaliate.

2011-11-12T13:20:00.002+08:00

Just came back from badminton session with Abigail!:D
*Brewing Good Luck Potion for Abigail* ('Cos she's getting back her promos results on Monday!)
You Can Do It!:D

I WANT TO GO RUNNING AND GYMMING!~~~
.....

aha!(:
Going Out with mum later!
.....

Okay, Okay, I admit, Havent been spending my time wisely.
I promised to Try to complete my homework within these two weeks,
that is, before I'm leaving for China!
.....

That's all for now ppl!
Would not be coming online tmr!(:

p.s. Imma spend my time wisely!

2011-11-11T10:24:00.004+08:00

Happy birthday to my papa!:D
and oh, my sis's birthday's 2 days before my dad!(:

I'm surprised this MV can actl made me tear even though I dun rly understand Korean!
I guess I was too unwell ysd, but I managed to endure!
(我再也不要忍了，因为超难受的！)
Thumbs up for Ah ping!(:

Oh ya! I've Linked Kepei and Dawn!:D

.....
p.s. I'm Sorry//
Does making a wish a 1111111111 really make a wish come true?

2011-11-08T20:01:00.003+08:00

Did quite a lot of brainless thing these few days.
Turn Crazy for no apparent reasons. (I hope I'm not like that normally, am I?)
I guess that's the aftermath of slacking too much.

And I just got back home from some catching-up sessions with people who really helped me alot,people I considered as 贵人。
Haha, my ex- colleagues, apparently, one's leaving Singapore to go back to China and
another's returning to Malaysia.
They're one of the nicest people I've ever met, the kind that really help people
WITHOUT ANY CONDITION.

I guess that catch-up session is the last-- parting session.
I guess I'm quite close to them 'cos they're only 23?
都是年轻人嘛！
......

I really did plenty of stuffs without thinking.
WHY AM I SO DUMB?
我再也不要上当了！
:(
Of all person, Why you??:(

p.s. Abigail! Jiayou for ur OP, dun worry! I'll cast my signature good luck & do well spell specially for u!
*Cast Good Luck & Do Well Spell for Abigail!*

2011-11-07T16:16:00.003+08:00

Ahhh!~ I want to do GEOGRAPHY not Econs!:(
Econs tutorial so difficult, my morale's totally defeated by Macro econs.
Blame it on the school's rigid subject combinations!
Totally stunned by q3 of short ans qns,
cos apparently, i'm required to do some funny calculation!
Calculation is so troublesome! I dun even like counting $$ too!
No wonder econs are for $$-minded ppl! (Okay, that's bad, I'm generalising)

*Self-hypnotising*
ECONOMICS ROCKS!

And oh!
Listen to this song!

I like this song, but I have an issue with the lyrics "I can't live without you"
"I can't live without you" is one of the World's most Cliched, unreliable, unrealistic, dumbest sentence ever. Are you sure you're gonna die instantly without another person?
I've never seen it. Really.
Fattest joke ever.
I supposed u call that 甜言蜜语 bah!

p.s. Worried for OP, 'cos I still stutter over little thing:(
I pray everything to go well for me! (and my fwens too!)

*cast good luck spells*

2011-11-06T20:52:00.004+08:00

Okay, managed to do something productive these 2 days.
Completed 2 chapters of Maths Hols Assignment and memorised my scripts for OP.
(shaln't elaborate how I practised OP)

And I've watched too much TV, so much so that I've turned dumb.
Siannn...

Fig 1: My Colour markers and colour pens.

What I do when I'm sad/sian/emotionless/tired(LOL):
1.) Sleep (BEST/FAVOURITE)
2.) Collect colour markers/ pens (The above are my collection except blue, black, and blue-black colours, 'cos they're the "Compulsary" that One should have)
3.) Read, until my my mood is appeased!
4.) Eat Ice-cream(Rarely)

What I do when I'm angry:
1.) Sleep (again)
2.)Read, until my mood is appeased! (again)

p.s. I'm so sian, I'd turned crazy! Ahhhhhh!~

2011-11-04T23:01:00.002+08:00

This stupid slack attitude cannot go on;
I needa start doing all those tutorials and revision papers!
Especially when my 15days are taken up for the Beijing&Shanghai trip!

I MUST SLEEP EARLY!-- So I dun have to take afternooon nap (waste time only).
Shaln't care about thesis for now, cos i've got time for it after my OP.

1.)As expected, bombarded with lots of qns for the 论文呈现.
2.)I bought “九阴真经” td!:D (I still cannot find my "葵花宝典” --My diary, lost it somewhere):
and oh! I just recalled I've got “降龙十八掌”!
3.)My 柳琴's birthday on the 23rd Nov! Intending to buy her a new 拨片(guitar pick).
Hopefully I can find SINEW 0.8mm type for her cos it has sharp edges!(:
But a bit tedious to get that specific type for her:(
.....

Thing I learnt:
If I want my baby girl to have rosy cheeks like XiuYi, Imma eat 红枣.
LOL! *Mad*

A definition for this week: Babies Week!

Watch this! *Heart melts*

p.s. Planning not to go online on Sat(tmr) to do Maths revision papers:(
I might come back on Sunday or perhaps Monday. (Depending on my mood)
Well, shall see if I can complete my work(:

2011-11-03T10:58:00.003+08:00

Okay, back from school, super early 'cos this week a lecture week.
Tmr: 论文（计划表）呈现
Last day of school on Friday.
Next Thurs (10 Nov): Actual Oral Presentation.

Hmmm... Feel better alrd, "recover" from panick attack and stress and anxiety and annoyance and anger le!
昨天，友人通过简讯与我闲聊，可说是她开导了我吧!
她很坦白地告诉我，自己的死穴。（都是吾已晓之死穴，可是都不愿面对，选择逃避）
她让我看见/领悟了些道理。
她鼓励了我，对于跟她聊些心里的顾虑我很放心，因为我知道她不会骗我。
她的话一针见血，却给了我很大的启发与鼓舞--
我不会再给自己没有必要的压力了！只要知道自己努力与尽力就足够了。
不应顾虑那么多，要consistent 地努力。

Sometimes, I really think that expressions are best expressed in chinese characters, 因为比较真实，比较有亲切感，让人有安全感？

p.s.
To-Do (according to 上映date) :
Watch
1.) 23:59
2.) Breaking Dawn Part 1 (EXCITED, been waiting for it like eternity)
3.) 那些年，我们一起追的女孩
4.) 一泡而红

Oh ya! Forgot to mention that the Beijing&Shanghai trip is confirmed!
26th Nov- 10th Dec! Excited 'cos I'll be going with 5 other Sots(Wankiang, Dawn, XiuYi, LeeCheng, ChinChiao)!
*Evil Plot*
Planning to buy China's newspapers and Chinese books to aid me in my thesis and for leisure purposes!:D

2011-11-02T08:02:00.002+08:00

Deleted that previous post that was posted at midnight cos it's too emo?

真的很累。

And I still got that stupid cca later on.
CO in JJC rly makes me feel like a bloody idiot.

I don't know how to fill up that stupid blanks in my CSC Thesis proposal for submission to SEAB.
Everything's screwed and I spend the entire night figuring out what was what.
Failed in the end.
I feel so screwed.

And the meeting with teacher doesn't seem to make anything right.
If you want to "leave me in the lurch", then why bother about me not going to meet u?

Bloody shit.
Everything's so screwed and I really want to sleep.

2011-11-01T14:49:00.002+08:00

Kamin!! Why ur blog de personality test all so cool de?!? With credits from http://i.mtime.com/yemmywong/blog/503952/

I did the test and the answers in green are my answers!(:

这是一个相当有趣的测验，请准备好纸笔来试试看。选择的方式是一题一题的记录下来，再由下面的解答来观看结果。

1.世界末日来临，假如你只能解救一种动物，你会选择哪一种？

A.兔 B.羊 C.鹿 D.马

2.你到非洲去，当你造仿一个部落时，他们坚持你选一种动物当作纪念，你会选哪一种？

A.猴 B.狮 C.蛇 D.长颈鹿

3.你做错事了，上帝惩罚你变成另一种动物，你会选哪一种？

A.狗 B.猫 C.马 D.蛇

4.假如你有能力使某种动物永远消失，你会选择哪一种？

A.狮 B.蛇 C.鳄鱼 D.鲨鱼

5.有一天你碰上了一种会说人话的动物，你希望是？

A.羊 B.马 C.兔 D.鸟

6.在一个孤立的岛上，你只能选择一种动物来陪你，你会选？

A.人 B.猪 C.母牛 D.鸟

7.假如你有能力可以驯服所有的动物，你会选择哪种动物来当你的宠物？

A.恐龙 B.白老虎 C.北极熊 D.豹

8.假如你有五分钟可以当一种动物，你会选择？

A.狮 B.猫 C.马 D.鸽子

解答：

1.是测验你在生活中会被哪一种人吸引。

A.兔—有分裂的人格，就像外表像冰但内心炽热的人。
B.羊—忠实顺从也温暖的人。
C.鹿—优雅及有礼貌的人。
D.马—不受约束向往自由的人。

2.是测验你在求爱的过程中，哪种情况最易使你觉得情不自禁。

A.猴—有创选性，从不会让你感到无聊。
B.狮—直来直往，只是告诉你他也爱你。
C.蛇—心情摇摆不定，忽冷忽热，由疑不定。
D.长颈鹿—耐性，对你永不放弃。

3.是测验你想给你的爱人留下什么印象呢？

A.狗—忠诚忠实，永不改变。
B.猫—有风格的。
C.马—乐观的。
D.蛇—可通融的。

4.是测验你最讨厌的个性中，哪一个会使你与你的爱人分手？

A.狮—你的爱人傲慢自大，表现得像一个独栽者
B.蛇—情绪化，太过喜怒无常，而你不知道如何取悦他。
C.鳄鱼—无情冷血又爱讽刺人。
D.鲨鱼—不安全牢靠。

5.是测验你想跟你的爱人建立一个什么样的关系？

A.羊—你俩不用多说话，用心沟通，对方会知道你要什么。
B.马—你俩能谈任何事情，没有秘密。
C.兔—一种让你一直能够感受到温暖和恋爱的关系。
D.鸟—你和爱人不但关心现在也关心将来，一种你能与之成长的长期关系。

6.是测验你会外遇吗？

A.人—你关心社会和道德规范，婚后你不会犯这样的错。
B.猪—你无法抗拒欲望淫欲，很有可能你会犯。
C.母牛—默认，但你会努力试着不要这样做。
D.鸟—你从来就不够坚定，事实上，你不适合婚姻，且你不想做承诺。

7.是测验你对婚姻的看法。

A.恐龙—你非常消极，你不认为快乐的婚姻存在．
　B.白老虎—认为婚姻时间很珍贵的事，一但你结婚，你会很珍视你的婚姻及你的伴侣．
　C.北极熊—你害怕婚姻，你认为婚姻夺走你的自由。
D.豹—你一直想要结婚，但是，事实上，你甚至不知道婚姻是什么。

8.是测验你此刻你对爱情的看法。

A.狮—你总是渴望爱情，你能为爱情做任何事，但你不会轻易就堕入情网。
B.猫—常自我中心，你认为爱情对你是可以轻易得到，能舍去但又需要的东西。
C.马—你不想被固定的关系绑住，你只想处处调情。
D.鸽子—你认为爱情是二人互相的承诺。

hmmm.... TRY THEM!

2011-11-01T14:32:00.004+08:00

Taken from XiuYi aka Juliet aka Somlee's mum's Blog!
This baby boy is mine!
My future son!
Hands off him!
*Pinch his cheeks*

*Sigh* I want many many children!
Teehee! Mad girl!

Alright, back to work yo!(:

p.s. 你可以用偏见把我玩死，但我不一定会倒。。。

I must learn to be a good girl, who keep my mouth shut and doesn't talk back to teachers.

2011-10-31T19:17:00.002+08:00

3rd Post of the day...

WHAT THE SHIT?!? Not trying to discriminate anyone,
But, I'VE GOT NEW CHEENA NEIGHBOURS!>:(
WALAU EH!
第一印响：不好
I've seriously got a VERY BAD impression of them!
It's like, even before they step into their new "home"
The massive lots of them were making super accented LOUD NOISES along the corridor!
Totally pissed me off!
I need my peace!

WHAT THE DA BIAN?!?
arghhhh!
TSK!
*ROLL EYES!*

p.s. I CAN TOTALLY HEAR THEIR ACCENTED MANDARIN FROM MY BRO'S ROOM!
Looks like I'll never be able to study in peace now!
*ear plugs in*

2011-10-31T16:15:00.002+08:00

Another post of the day before I take my afternoon nap!

Ya lah! Ya lah! I know I'm like a pig ogay! *Oink*

Went to kamin's blog and found this! http://www.colorgenicstest.com/

Did the test and ta-da! My results are as below:

At this particular time you are feeling the results of extreme stress and you are seeking a 'way out' but you are pushing too hard. Obviously you need peace, tranquillity and contentment. Your temperament is such that you are hoping, unrealistically perhaps, that your desires will shortly be fulfilled (even if at this time you are not quite sure what those true aspirations may be!).

You are very talented, imaginative and sensitive but you are holding back as you do not really like going it 'on your own'. In preference you would like to team up with someone, someone with similar attributes as your own, to explore - to seek out and go perhaps 'where no other man has trod before'. It is the unusual that attracts you and which will give you a sense of excitement and adventure.

You are not an argumentative sort of person and 'rather than fight - you'd switch' (an old cigarette ad cliche). But when you try to assert yourself - as sometimes you may try to do - you meet with so much resistance and effrontery that manifests itself so obviously that you become hurt, indignant and resentful. So in order to have peace and quiet you tend to become inhibited. You keep it all to yourself but deep down, you 'feel' and 'hurt' a lot.

You are an emotional, sincere and impressionable individual experiencing frustration and unnecessary stress. You vehemently resist any form of pressure from outside sources, insisting on your independence as an individual. You want to be a decision maker - to make up your own mind without interference. You wish to be able to draw your own conclusions and arrive at your own decisions. You detest uniformity and mediocrity as you want to be regarded as one who gives authoritative opinions. Your favourite expression could well be that 'I may not always be right but I am never wrong'. You're a perfectionist and even though you may feel that the other person's point of view may be right, you find it extremely difficult to admit that you could be wrong.

You would like to be respected and valued for yourself and this can only be achieved from within a close and harmonious relationship.

hmmmm... *Thinking*

2011-10-31T15:50:00.005+08:00

Guess who is this!
This is Dark from D.N Angel!
My ideal guy 'cos he's intelligent and HE CAN FLY!
*Blush*
I wish I have a bf who can fly:(
LOL

*Sigh* I wish Dark is chubbier so he'll be nicer to hug!

Okay, maybe this is more realistic, Bae Soo Bin, 35years old.

My cup of tea! TEEHEE!

LOL. Nehmind me ppl, this happens to be the after effects of the massive pressure uploaded upon me for these 2 weeks. Okay, so now A Level H1 Chinese papers down. what's next?

2011-10-27T22:44:00.003+08:00

Last video to share, another favourite of mine, before I'm REALLY ABSTAINING from this blog till 31st Oct

-Repenting- In- Progress-
Abstaining from this blog till 31st Oct.

Again, Dun miss me,
If u do, Dream of me!(发神经)!:P
希望来个恶梦吓死你！:P
Nah, I'm not so bad (I think?)

-Repent mode-

2011-10-26T22:40:00.002+08:00

A random thing;
Love the suspense created initially and the sudden ascending tension in the middle of the melody and the mysterious atmosphere at arnd 9min and the sudden suspense again as the melody approaches the end! I think the coolest part is actl the whistling!

p.s. :(
//I ought to feel guilty for slacking too much:(

-Repenting in progress-

Alright, Imma be happy(:
See my smile? *SMILE*

2011-10-26T01:09:00.002+08:00

Blogged a post just now, but bcos I dun rly want anyone to see my reflections,
so here I am, posting an extra post to block off that previous post(:

-Peace-
-Repent mode-
Thou shalt abstain from blogging for now(:

p.s. 不想让人猜测我到底在想些什么(: I guess that's why ppl find me weird(:

2011-10-26T00:10:00.004+08:00

Broke my promise of abstaining from this blog, I'm sorry ppl.
Can't really study or do my CSC Thesis in peace/ at ease (Whatever u call that)
心中有些感概与情绪真的需要一个管道抒发。。。。。。

无意中翻出了些以前的成绩单。。。。。。
自然而然地就与现在的成绩单做个比较。。。。

我不禁感概，若当初能开窍的话，也许我现在或许就有所不同吧？
Not trying to say I'm 开窍 now or anything--
Just feel that I'm kinda "different" from the past...
But I just can't pinpoint what's the change...

人生为什么有那么多“如果”？
“如果” 的威力真强大，使一股后悔之情，悄悄地爬上了这即将爆开的脑袋，即将撕裂的心脏。。。。。。

LOL. Funny and random me. Why did I even type out that?
I won't look back and regret anymore.
......

论文is a total mess, 为什么最后一个的永远都是我？
After rejections from the teacher and cracking my brain to think of a new topic,
I guess I kinda know what topic I'm gonna focus on(:
Needa start researching alrd!(:
I must stay positive! (:
[though It's really very depressing/demoralising/exhaustive/:'(]

......

Actl, I kinda realised, 原来压力能逼一个人在一夜间长大 (Based on my observaation)
小时候终渴望长大，大了后反而希望不要长大。。。。。。
Funny.

In short, my "discovery of my result slip" and reflection from numerous incidents are the causes of my reflections and thoughts.

p.s. Feel so much better after whinning/complaining/ranting/crapping/bull-shitting/lalala-ing!
I must remain fearless! Must stay Positive!
Everything's gonna be alright!

I won't look back and regret anymore(:

Alright ppl, gonna take a break from this blog.
Thou shalt only come back after H1 chinese papers on the coming monday!
-Repent Mode-
(:

2011-10-19T19:12:00.002+08:00

For the Sake of 'A' Level, I shall abstain from this blog till 31st Oct

31st Oct: A Level H1 Chinese Papers
10th Nov: PW Oral Presentation (Moderator's going to observe my group--Stress)

I guess I'll be too pressurize over my CSC Thesis's proposal till April 2012(Next Year).

Don't Miss me(:

2011-10-18T13:58:00.003+08:00

Okay, So We're not going to the lib td
cos We've not yet approach the tcher on whether our Thesis topics are feasible.
Well, probably going on friday or perhaps on sat?
Cos I'll start work once the tcher nods her head
*sigh*
Now things are back to normal, no more slack days!

*Yawn*
Slept at 2+am to find good materials for my thesis.
Ended up, I was half-dead during Econs tutorial.
Rly tried to keep myself awake by drinking water.
Well... Info enters from the left ear and exit from the right ear.
Sadly, Leecheng dunwan to pinch me awake, so I forced my eyes wide open,
though my soul had alrd left my body..

Same thing happened for econs lecture.
Was rly enthu to listen to the lecture initially!
But at the critical last 25min, my mind begins to fail me!

*Yawn*
I supposed it's time for my afternoon nap?
Gonna be a long night...

p.s. I find it annoying/disappointing to see children younger (way way younger) than me smoking or scolding vulgarities!
I wonder what went wrong during their 成长阶段...
Bcos I'd always believed that children are the most innocent being in this world
though I never agree with 人之初，性本善...

社会真的变了很多，是不是一个比较developed的社会孕育较多社会问题？
从前的人富有人情味，现在的人却冷漠无情。
或许这就是现代的社会。
hmmm...

Anw! The Sots will be celebrating Dawn's birthday tmr!:D
Teehee!:D
No school tmr! Promotion Day!
But still need to go back to school for the CLEP Overseas Immersion Programmes Briefing!
Teehee!:D

2011-10-18T00:42:00.004+08:00

Midnight- Super eerie. But 我天不怕，地不怕，只怕论文不成功。

Yeap, It's super late now I know, I'm still looking for information that'll help me in my CSC thesis preparation(:
Going to Lee Kong Chian Library @ Bugis?? @Cityhall?? @Bras Basah??
Da bian lah... I dun even noe the location.
Heck care, I'm not going alone (Thank god)
Going with Wankiang and Dawn to look for our materials aft sch tgt(:
It's worth being a little kiasu- at least it gives me a sense of security.
LOL.

I cannot live without planning, cannot live without confidence- and that confidence comes from preparation beforehand. LOL.
Too demanding I guess. 我只想尽力做得最好，dunwan any regrets.

On a side note, Lee Kong Chian Library rly offers a wide range of quality resources based on what I've found out on the Internet and on printed materials! (有人格保障的okay! XP)

Hmmm...

2011-10-17T16:28:00.003+08:00

Actl, I'm kinda sad when my parents dun understand the subject combi I'm taking...
Looks like, I needa communicate more with my parents...

[-Edited bcos too 消极-]

But One thing for sure, My dad knows I hate maths and numbers!
There was one time he talked to me about doing business course in Uni
and I went like:"我死都不要读business, 我最讨厌号码了！连钱都懒得算，怎么可能读?"
LOL. My dad was very 无奈, can tell he's a little pissed off :X

Super worried for PW and CSC thesis.
Aiyo, Shouldn't waste time worrying, I shld just do my best.
Do my best!
Do my best!

顺其自然吧！

2011-10-15T22:03:00.002+08:00

Was supposedly supposed to do I&R...
Well... was kinda drifted off!
Went to visit Leecheng's tumblr! bcos She's got a new link and
I'm not telling anyone!:D
Teehee!

Read her post and started thinking...
Hmm... I'm still young... (well... I supposed 17yrs old is considered young?)
I ought to try something new, something crazy, something fun, something I thought I'll never do?
I don't want a life filled with regrets;
I want a life filled with memories-- Happy, exciting, thrilling ones(:

*Burst my bubbles*
But, for now, Thou shalt focus on my priority as a student.
-Back to repenting mood-

2011-10-15T20:03:00.003+08:00

I ought to thank Abigail for helping me to edit my part for my PW OP PPT!
Thank you very much Abigail!:D Love you much much!:DD *Muack*

Now, I can finally focus on I&R at ease(:
Today I didn't watch running man♥
bcos there's not enuff time for doing productive work:(
Rushing my PW, cos I seriously hate dragginggggg~
...
Went NUS for Chinese Symposium with the Sots!
Sorry for leading you girls to alight at the wrong stop:(
Ended up we had to walk:(
My sense of direction nowadays CMI liao:((
CAN WE PLAY HIDE-AND-SEEK PLEASEEE???~~ XD
......

This week is a happy week(: I laughed and entertained myself alot!
It's been a long time since I laughed like mad(:

p.s. I still cannot find my diary:(

Actl, I'm very worried for my H1 Chinese,
I've been having nightmares on scoring a 'B' for H1 Chinese and I woke up feeling damn scared and stress.
I need a decent grade.
No, no, no, hang on, that's too negative
我要相信自己的能力!
I need to repent for screwing up both my oral and listening compre.

2011-10-14T19:33:00.003+08:00

Somehow, My post is missing. Well.. Shall update about this week another time!
Currently Infatuated with Nichkhun from 2pm after watching Running Man.
Broke my own promise of not coming internet(I guess Self-promise don't count? Teehee!)

p.s. Glad I'd made you girls laugh like how u all made me smile in JJ:D
*everyday I sot!~*

2011-10-12T22:33:00.006+08:00

This is bad, very bad. It's merely the end of promos and
I'm enjoying my life-aft-promos to the fullest.
This is extremely bad- It's not even the end of 'A's and
I'm alrd starting to procrastinate.
I'M EVEN WATCHING RUNNING MAN LIKE NOBODY'S BUSINESS FROM DAY TO NIGHT!
Bad, Bad, Very Bad.
Bad ah ping *Slap myself*

To punish myself and To repent, I'll stay away from this blog for 3days until Sunday.

P.s. I think God is giving me nightmares on my results bcos I'm too slack.

And I think I disappointed my father- I meant he looked very sad when I'm not listening to him when he's trying to talk to me. Sorry papa:(
I seriously cnnt disappoint my parents; they've got high hopes on me, and though they didn't say anything like "please score an A" or rather they specifically emphasize on "just pass can alrd",
I can tell they're trying not to pressurize me even though they rly want me to do well.
I guess I'm rly a psychic.
It's like, I think I can feel the inner thoughts of ppl, I just didn't say it out
bcos It's pretty sensitive.

Well oh well, I'll just continue being a mad girl.
Act blur lives longer.

2011-10-12T17:14:00.002+08:00

Ahhhhhh!~~ I want to kill alot of ppl alrd (dear friends, u noe who u are lah huh!XS)
:'( I'M NOT A STALKER!
Refer to previous post.
But nah, since u girls are my fwens, who makes my day in JJC a happier one,
朕就不怪你们! 朕就免了你们的死罪！还不快向朕道谢！

p.s. Surprisingly, I think I've got improvement for promos!
Yay! I supposed It's good to aim lower,
bcos u won't feel the pressure when u aim only an 'E'?

2011-10-11T21:51:00.002+08:00

Wanted to change my blogskin, but that's another story that probably only XiuYi and Kamin noe:X
Looks like I'm in love w my blogskin.
And oh!
I listened to u LeeCheng, see the left hand side of my blog? Not so wordy liao!:D
Honestly, I blog bcos my friends still blogs!:D
Teehee!
I must 坚持到底！我要blog下去!

And, Dear friends(U noe who u are lah huh!:P),
dun get me into trouble by clicking on the links okay? I'm deadly serious.
Aft all, those are meant to make my blog nicer?
Dunwan other ppl to 想太多。

p.s. Totally awkward turtle in the first place, but now no more turtling!:D
差点"崩溃", not gonna "play" le. Xiuyi and Kamin, dun tell anyone okay!:D

2011-10-10T18:25:00.001+08:00

omg. this is total shit. Hate being so vulgar but THIS IS SO DAMN DABIAN!
Just discovered sth new, but not good.

God bless me.

2011-10-10T17:39:00.004+08:00

Careless Mistakes kills; There goes my 'A' for maths.
It's a super easy paper and yet I've got 10+++marks worth of careless mistakes.
心痛，心很痛，心很痛很痛。

I wanted that 'A' so badly.
Dropped from an 'A' to a 'B', that feeling totally sucks.

And though I kinda clear my H1 papers, I dun really think I did well.
I could have done better (That's another story)
Haix...

I guess I'm just ambitious. That's why many ppl thinks I demand a lot.
没办法，我就是那么现实。
Imperfect Perfectionist.

I honestly don't see any hope in the rest of my papers- My nightmares tells me not to.

p.s. The only thing on my mind is only food.
I guess that's 'cos there's rly nth for me to do.

OH YA! I JUST LINK YOU MY DEAREST XIUYI!:D TEEHEE! FINALLY RMB TO LINK U!:D

Haix.. Needa do my hw liao. Not going to spend so long on the net.

2011-10-09T21:06:00.003+08:00

Slightly Drifted off the mass conversation on our House(Owens) CIP
Bad Ah Ping *smack my face*
To give a conclusion of this one week of my life.

这一星期的所见所闻，让我有所感慨：
错事，傻事，无聊事；问心无愧是天大的喜事，好事，快乐事。

(-Backspaced-)

p.s. really feel bored these few days cos there's rly nth for me to do, fb can seem abit sian aft some time and My only entertainment probably comes from Youtube and online shops.
Been's a long time since I go shopping and online shopping.

2011-10-09T19:57:00.000+08:00

I'm serious. That was the last time. No more, Nothing more-- I hope.

2011-10-09T12:09:00.004+08:00

Had a nightmare last night.
I dreamt that I failed Econs again.
I dreamt that I did badly for my promos.
有点恐怖。
I told my mum about it.
And I think I made a wrong choice in telling her,
'Cos she'll never give me the right assurance I need.
They'll say sth that I rly dunwan to hear or listen.
Funny how I told them abt my stuffs in the first place.

hmmm...
I was reminded of something, but I couldn't pinpoint what's the 'something' I was reminded of.
My memory sucks nowadays.

p.s. Sorry Abigail, Couldn't go badminton with u, was rly looking forward to play badminton for a long time, and I even prepared the stuffs happily, didn't realised I could cause so much trouble in just one night. We'll go play badminton soon!

2011-10-08T23:52:00.002+08:00

Had a great Saturday day to night with the 27th(X-factors)!
Great catching up session!(:
Love them!(:
.....

*yawn*
Still editing the Oral Presentation ppt slides due on Monday!
Just as I thought I'm able to enjoy myself for this weekend at the minimum, works just keep flowing in!

Oh well, Jiayou bah. I must be positive! I must hang in there!

p.s. Heard shocking news td. Totally ruined my mood!

oh ya,
hurt my alrd "deformed" spine during P.E. on fri and the excruciating pain is haunting me.
And I sprained my neck for the umpteenth time!
What's wrong w me sia?
I just realised I lost my diary too!
That's bad.

2011-10-07T21:21:00.000+08:00

Honestly, find this very sweet(:

2011-10-07T20:32:00.003+08:00

Ｗａｒｎｉｎｇ：　Ｔｈｅ　ｂｅｌｏｗ　ｐｏｓｔ　ｃｏｎｔａｉｎｓ　ｌｏｔｓ　ｏｆ　Ｗｈｉｎｉｎｇ．　Ｓｃｒａｍ　ｉｆ　ｙｏｕ＇ｒｅ　ｎｏｔ　ｉｎｔｅｒｅｓｔｅｄ．

Was kinda sad ysd (maybe not? 麻木 seems like a better choice.)
被酸得好惨；只因华语说得很流利，很标准。
Used quite a number of "chim words" as said by them.
Actl, those words aren't even chim, they're just not widely used in Singapore bcos it's too accurate.
e.g. I said 'shi yi dian' “十一点” and they were so damn shocked bcos i pronounced that 'h'
...

。。。
我没有排斥华文教师这职业；
我只是不想被不尊重华文的学生打击了我的信心。。。
我信心已在JJ 被打击了很多次;
That caused me to dislike my roots and my fav subject for quite a period of time until I met the Sots. And thank god Abi encouraged me back then(:

Aiyo, dunwan to think so much for now, I'd rather focused on what I have now, I dunwan to plan for the future that early. The future seems scary? Let future paint itself!

Now, I can't be bothered with others' unnecessary comments.
I'd rather focused on my priority as a student and work hard for now.
And be happy with what I'm doing.
After all, You can't awaes expect things to go your way.
Whine whine 就算了(:
只要我开心就好
I dunwan to be someone I'm not(:

2011-10-05T17:34:00.004+08:00

Promos end liao! Teehee! Feel so relaxed now!
The papers were quite okay i guess? EXCEPT CHINESE LITERATURE!
I swear I screwed up my Chinese Lit!
ahhhhhh!~ All cos my memory space is taken up! Rly cnnt rmb anything!
I didn't try my best. I was too exhausted, too annoyed (with the qns) -.-
I can hear myself cursing and swearing at the paper!(Sorry to those who sat arnd me:S)
I swear I did those qns before BUT I SERIOUSLY CANNOT RECALL ANYTHING!
Somebody! Save my memory! Gimme good brain and memory space!
*Cross fingers*
Let's hope I score FULL MARKS(dream on) for CLL Paper 1 to offset my disatrous CLL P2 results:X
......

Watched 辛亥革命(1911) today after CLL P2 with the sots! Was laughing at 'funny' parts
（吾非愚昧麻木之群众；只是特高兴疲惫的日子短暂地结束了）
CLL & CSC information flooded my mind while watching 1911;
background info very useful for such movie.
And! There was MASSIVE numbers of Tiong Tiongs at the Movie Theatre!
I presume the ratio of Tiong Tiongs to S'preans to be 9:0.5 bah? Teehee!
走到哪儿仿佛都被无形的压力包围着。好无奈啊!

Teehee! An attempt to improve my chinese language via the use of both EL and CL in daily life!
Impressed? OMG. I Feel Crazy man!
Must be the aftermath of studying everyday!

Everyday I'm ~~shuffling~~ studying~ *singing to the tune of partyrock anthem*

2011-09-06T20:14:00.002+08:00

Shall abstain from this blog too, for the sake of Promos.

28th Sept- 5th Oct.

Not because I'm hardworking or mugger or any crap.
I just need to repent.

|Repenting- in- progress|

Don't miss me(:

2011-09-05T21:51:00.002+08:00

Unproductive, Super Unproductive.
That's why i needa get out of my house.
Off to my favourite library by myself, alone, on my own, whatever you call that.
Lazy me.
Nah, I won't be alone, at least for now(:

I doubt anyone knows my whereabout every sat?
Hmmm... I guess I'm just too weird, quirky, abnormal?
I never wanted to be normal, at least, I just want to be UNIQUE. Just ME!
That probably explains my 'unique' opinions. Opinions that just makes ppl shake their heads.
-.-
I guess the worst thing on Earth is I dun even noe myself! :(

庆幸我的好友包容我古怪，摸不着头脑的个性
that's enough for me, I wouldn't ask for more
even though I'm forever whining over trivial stuffs to entertain myself -.-

Haix... I'm just so unpredictable I never know what I'm going to do next...

p.s.
脑海里真的好混乱，思绪也不停的交叉，仿佛提醒自己如果不想笑就别笑了。
未来？将来？我真的不想去想。。。
因为我害怕，害怕自己所谓的“理想”并不是自己想要的。

人最害怕的到底是什么？
我不懂。真对的不晓得。实在不知道。
或许就如我父母常说的吧：我真的不是人。
I never know what they want of me. 我有那么差吗？
我只知道我最害怕后悔，最害怕走错路。。。

LOL. I guess I should just stop thinking and return to the reality.
Give up my citizenship of fairyland bah, I can never live in fairyland in peace.

2011-09-04T20:10:00.001+08:00

Super Unproductive at Home.
T^T

2011-09-02T22:53:00.002+08:00

I'm so scared to check my email nowadays :'(
Cos I noe It'll be filled with more and more PW emailssssssss!! :'(

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!~~~~
And I gave myself a challenge!
Don't use facebook until the end of promos!

I NEH TOUCH FACEBOOK FOR THE SECOND DAY LIAO!!!!:DD
Impressed??
Don't Jealous kay!:P

p.s. I nearly log in to my mobile phone's fb just now! Thank god I 'block' myself in my own phone cos I noe i can't resist temptation!

SELF- DISCIPLINE!

2011-08-30T02:03:00.002+08:00

I really think 宋词真的好美哦！
And 小说 is rly interesting and it never fails to prompt me to qns the rationale behind every words!

This is the first time I Feel that I'm really thinking!:D
Omg! It took me so long to realise I never think (as in never questioning my doubts and theory by just taking what is given to me) when I'm studying!
No wonder I did so badly during 'O's!
Well, It's over alrd and I shaln't ponder over it!

From now on, I Shall question all Assumptions and bombard ppl arnd me with qns!
Dun be scared of me kay!
I just want to learn!:D

Promos from 28th Sept to 5th Oct!
Let's take it as I've got only 20 days left for revision (after minus-ing eat, bathe, sleep, do pw thingy timing)

JIAYOU!
不能被打倒！(':
乐观一点! (':

2011-08-21T15:07:00.002+08:00

haix... Promos coming le, and I'm still in lala land...
I lack the motivation to study...
The time table which i did to pace myself is seriously screwed by me...
I ought to Admit it, I'm Just a lazy bum who never learn my lesson...

And I seriously hate doing PW...
It's a never-ending process and I feel so dejected whenever my work is rejected.
*heart-broken, eyes-watery*
Hopefully, efforts will pay off, I dun mind sacrificing my sleep to get everything done..

And with that, I end off with a song that Abigail introduced me to:

Get It Right

What have I done? I wish I could run.
Away from this ship going under
Just trying to help, hurt everyone else
Now I feel the weight of the world is
On my shoulders

What can you do when your good isn't good enough?
When all that you touch tumbles down?
'Cause my best intentions keep making a mess of things
I just wanna fix it somehow
But how many times will it take?
Oh, how many times will it take for me?
To get it right
To get it ri-igh-ight

p.s. It doesn't matter I guess, after all it's my fault again...

2011-08-18T22:23:00.003+08:00

Positive. Positive. Positive.
Yes, I must be more positive and optimisitic.

Sentence of the week: Laughing and smiling a lot does not necessarily makes one an optimistic person.
.....

Gonna chiong PW again for td and tmr. That's all for now.
Btw, I should cut down on blogging until the end of promos (5th Oct)

*faint*
*slap my face*
Wake up le!
不要临时抱佛脚！

2011-08-15T18:55:00.002+08:00

Stop all these bullshitting like seriously.
I may be dumb, but I'm definitely not gullible.

Thankyouverymuch.

2011-08-15T18:30:00.003+08:00

I'm not supposed to be online, but, haix... the fire within me is diminishing.
...
I've always been crazy.
Yeah, been sleeping aft 3am these few days(even on a sch day).
I guess my insomnia's back, together with horrible dreams of being trampled upon by the tiong tiong, being crashed by tons of chinese files and CSC files, forcing myself to write chinese characters with insane speed.
I even dreamt of falling down from some place and landing myself into an unknown place.
I dreamt of fear, of anxiety, of rebelling.

Now, I'm scared.
I guess I asked for it. 一切都是自找的。

...
p.s. I love my diary(:
There's obviously so much stuffs that I can't write here. With a diary, I can awaes pen down my thoughts anytime, anywhere.

2011-08-09T19:15:00.003+08:00

This is The first Year I didn't enjoy the NDP Parade.
How can I?!? When I'm multi-tasking--
doing PW on one hand and checking out the Uni admission criteria on the other hand?
How can I not be stress? When I know that many courses in Uni are literally block out to me, yes, Literally block out. I'm stuck with limited choices.
On top of that, I wonder if I can even attain at least at BBB/A.

I'm scared:(
This is for NTU: http://www3.ntu.edu.sg/oad2/website_files/IGP/AY10-11_IGP.pdf
NUS: http://www.nus.edu.sg/oam/gradeprofile/sprogramme-igp.html

Haix...

2011-08-07T22:15:00.002+08:00

Something to share (As if anybody would like to know -.-)
I really like singing! I like watching arts performances and I like learning how to play instruments!
It's like I'll feel damn sian if u want me to learn maths concept or do worksheet and etc, but I'm awaes eager and happy to learn and try something new for music!

And, I'm not allowed to sing at home just because my sister doesn't like it.
I'm the ELDEST okay!
ahhhhh~
That's awaes the reason why I want an elder sister from protect me from a younger sister who trample over my head!
Gahhhhhh~

Nah, I don't think I can sing well! Singing just makes me feel happy!
I mind singing in front of many ppl cos I'll feel shy de! *blush* -.-

2011-08-06T17:02:00.003+08:00

Okay, It's a saturday when I'm supposed to be out with whatever 'tiring work' I'm supposed to be doing( Shall not elaborate here) Until today's CSC Seminar took up my time!:(
I dun learn anything for the seminar at all actl:((

Now "Today I Don't Feel Like Doing Anything~"
Yeah, Slacking at the moment, but gonna chiong PW at Night T^T

这几天的愤怒与报负心情终于慢慢地谈化了.. (hmmmm... I guess that's cos I sleep enuff to eliminate that annoyance within me? All I know is that my mood and complexion would be terrible if i dun have enuff sleep)
把心情藏在心里是很快变老的毒药!
原来冰淇淋是安抚我心灵的良药！

p.s. I rolled my eyes at the civics tutor accidentally!
I guess That's me again, never changing the stupid straightforwardness and bluntness of mine!

2011-08-05T18:29:00.002+08:00

Oh Ya! If I Die Young by The Band Perry is a good song!
Right Ah- Bi- Gay?? *WINK*
''I'll Just Burn You"© Classic comment from Abgail *Copyrighted*

2011-08-05T17:28:00.003+08:00

A summary of this school week!
A super exhasuting and annoying and sad school week!
Time flies scarily fast, It leaves me breathless.
:((

1.) I really feel so tired to the extent I actly Slept when I was bathing! And I dozed off while having my dinner and I slept immediately upon reaching home!
As usual, I sleep late to complete my homework and etc :'(
Just when I thought I'd completed my stuffs, another piles of work comes crashing on my head!
Work can never be done I guess, because I'm slow? or Is it bcos of poor time management?

2.) I'm seriously becoming a good girl alrd, I try my best to do ALL my hw, try my best to submit my hw on time, try my best to attempt all tutorials qns (even if i dunnoe how to do them). I even opened my golden mouth and asked a lot of stupid questions!

3.) I havent been touching my laptop on wed and thurs! (2 Consecutive days! Though I'm guilty of using my phone to go online -.-''') *Applause!* Partly, bcos I'd been busy rushing my work, Partly bcos I'm too TIRED to do so, Partly bcos I'm too sad to do so
(ref to 命运的迹线：下午的音乐课时，他们发现这个孩子缺席了。本来他是班上最善唱歌的孩子，但这一堂课却遗失了他那春日阳光一般的歌喉。）Oh ya, I start to minimise the rate at which I msg my fwens!

4.) I strained my fingers while practising my instrument. *Pain* I guess that's the consequences of not touching her (我的柳琴）for 2 weeks. That's awaes the case, when you don't get in touch with sth for a long time, the bond cultivated will awaes break. I see my liuqin not as 'sth', I see her as an instrument that can communicate with me, an instrument that can understand my feelings, I see her as an instrument with her own temperament ‘灵性’.

5.) I'm really scared now, especially aft td's econs lecture. What if I cannot make it to Uni because my results aint good?

6.) I confessed. I woke up on wed morning, lying on my bed for abt 10min thinking if I shld go to the sch. I brushed my teeth and changed into school Uniform oso thinking abt the same thing. I nearly pon school on wed bcos I couldn't finish studying for my 宋词（雨霖铃 & 武陵春）test. But I'm glad I didn't pon in the end bcos I would been a coward. No, I'm not a coward and from now on, I'll Never Run Away from problems.

7.) To the lousy teachers out there (Especially- the- you-know-who- Lousy- Civics Tutor)
I Won't Forgive and I Won't Forget.
One day, I'll make sure You'll feel sorry for what you did. (I should use the word 'does' instead because you're still persistent in the same old lousy ways you're adopting) *Offence intended*
Yes, One day, You're gonna feel very sorry for what you're doing.
I don't curse people. But, I sincerely believes in karma and retributions.
I hope You'll not get away this time.
Don't worry, let nature takes its course, I won't be the one bringing trouble (Though I'm alrd am one)

I guess I'm the '拿得起，放不下' type. I'll awaes rmb this vivdly.
What doesn't kill you, makes you stronger.
It's tough once again, But I'll make sure I'll survive.

p.s. For the sake of my conduct grade, I cannot 顶嘴. I must Endure!
I guess this character of mine, this straightforwardness and bluntness will kill me one day. I must change. Yes, I must.

2011-08-02T19:52:00.003+08:00

I'm Sorry, I'm sorry to my dad for misunderstanding his intention when he scolded me over the phone... (I nvr expect my dad to scold me when all I needed was words of consolation)
Still, I'm thankful that my dad fetched me home from the hellish school (I rly needed a quick escape from that hellish school). He bought me food knowing tt I'm starving.
I'm rly sorry to bring u nothing but troubles.
Yes, My dad still nags about what happened to me in school.
I promised u, yes, dad, u, that I'll endure through all the shit that JJC and the teachers are giving me. I'll try my best.
...
我从未感受到那般的委屈过。
这是第一次，我竟然委屈地掉下那不该掉下的眼泪。
I would never, NEVER, say sorry to an irresponsible civics tutor (Is he even fit to be called a 'Civics Tutor'?

Is it justified for a civics tutor who never do anything AT ALL to flame up the entire incident to the principal just to get students into trouble, a trouble that we may not be able to save our butt from?
This incident had just ended, but i rly feel a sense of injustice within me. What's with the education system in the School?
For a first offender who don't mean to be late for civics lesson just because we were printing either or A Level PW EoM or GPP or Written Report,
Is it really necessary to flame up this incident by reporting us to the principal?
Is it rly necessary to cause our A Level PW to be nearly jeopardize by considering NOT TO MARK our EoM?
Is it rly necessary to forfeit our examination rights?
Why is it not necessary to settle a small case on your own?
Why is it not necessary to give us warnings?

I guess you just hate me, you just hate me, my dearest Civics Tutor, to the extent I nearly cause the entire group to lose their marks for A Level PW when u report us to the Principal.
I guess u were 'innocent' enuff not to know that the adverse effects on students like us.
You don't know because you are not a singaporean kid, neither do you study in a singapore college.

I would never shed a tear in a place that don't deserve my tears ever again.
I won't waste that precious tears of mine ever again.

p.s. thank you Sots Sots for making my days a happier one and thank god my dad didn't breathe a word to my mum.
...

It's hard, but I'll survive.

2011-07-31T15:08:00.003+08:00

I wish I'm smarter, So I don't have to struggle for studies:'(
My luck is running out (Cos I'd been spamming and relying on lucks these days!)
I'm so slow:( When ppl are starting to sprint, I'm still crawling:(
Maybe because I slacked too much, Maybe because I procrastinate alot, Maybe because I'm simply lazy... zZz -->Maybe bcos I dun do homework:X
Well, It's my problem then, Can't blame it on anyone.

That's all for now folks! I'm gonna chiong GPP!
Re-edit the whole GPP! :'(

2011-07-30T23:01:00.002+08:00

Home- a good place to sleep, bathe, eat (FULLSTOP)
A place where my mood fluctuates.

I hope u can stop criticising me.
All parents dote on their kids. Yes, I know you dote on me.
But, that's not the care and concern I want... Those were never what I wanted.
Please don't make me feel worthless.

Now I long for an elder sister:( I'd rather be the youngest. Nobody will find faults with me, Nobody, yes, nobody at all.
...

One day, I'll be so Sad that I'll vanished into the thin air, quietly and secretly, without anyone realising that I'd gone with the wind.
And only The leaves will fall in remembrance of me.
One day, I'll venture out on my own. Yes, I will.

2011-07-30T21:41:00.002+08:00

Life's so messed-up... *sigh*
And Exhausting... *sigh*
Gah...

Where's ur Discipline?!?

p.s. It was fun singing on the MRT with Ah Gay!(:

2nd p.s.
WHO WANT TO WATCH FINAL DESTINATION 5 WITH ME?!? pretty pleaseeeeeee!~
MUST BE BRAVE DE HOR! :P

2011-07-29T17:00:00.002+08:00

I never wanted to be here, here in JJC, but there I was surviving 6months of my 17years old life in JJC. Thankgod.
Thank my fwens who made my not-so-happy life a livelier one!
I have Abi and gang, my Sot Sot fwens in JJC and many others who truly care(:
And I hope all these will remain in my life forever!

Today, I laughed a lot! All thanks to the crazy SotSot! HAAHAHA!(:
I feel happy to be happy!(: (I love my laughter! Can't find anything wrong with it ogay girls!)
......

I guess some ah tiongs are rly out to hurt ppl! *ouch*
Hmmm...
But you know, I'll fight and defend!

P.s. 宋词 are so much more beautiful than 唐诗!!<3<3<3

2011-07-28T00:38:00.001+08:00

12.15am. Finally done with my EOM (Izzit my draft 4 or should it be considered draft 5?)
I dunnoe, hopefully the teacher dun contradict her words again. (I dunwan to work in vain)
I only want to do my best.
I dun mind doing drafts over and over again till my draft reaches perfection.
Oh Nope, I mind, under the condition when I have plenty on my plate.
Or because I procrastinate too much? Hmmmm...
.....

Anw, Everyday I see and hear sth 'funny' on the buses.
2days ago on bus 99 back home..
Boy1: I dun like PBL(problem- based- learning), I prefer NOTES!
Boy2: Me too! PBL quite useless loh!
Me: ***Giggling within me***

Well, I'm surprised that Spoon-feeding is such a common phenonmenon in Singapore that kids these days cannot tahan learning independently by making use of their innate creativity (do they even have them?) and logic! Perhaps students like us are so used to spoon-feeding that we forget how Authentic Education should be like! We've forgotten that education is supposed to be fun, we've forgotten that education is sharing, we've forgotten that education is moulding our characters and etc! (which brings me to another point ltr)
I dun deny that I used to be like that in Sec1 and 2 (yeah, super immature indeed). Dun get me wrong, I like doing projects and finding my own information, especially with my crazy fwens, but I just dun understand the rationale why we're doing all these projects when in the end, WE ARE GIVEN NOTES! Funny huh? I dun understand alot of thing! (I'm dumb I admit)
I dun understand why are those projects graded! I mean srly, we'll slog our guts out knowing it'll be graded. The qns is, do we rly do those PBL thing for our own understanding and satisfaction or do we do those PBL for OUR GRADES ONLY?
I'll be lying if i say "PBL thing for our own understanding and satisfaction". Education has taught me to be realistic. Multiple failures and You're out of the game. Because Singapore can awaes import 'talents' overseas...............

Another pt. I dun understand how MOE gives scholarship. Why do ppl with extremely good results but EFFING characters gets them when ppl who deserves them more weren't given a chance at all? There are some effing humans out there who just dump SHITS on peers &mates and claims credits for a good job done from them in their testimonial; These 'wonderful' humans merely focused on individual achievement and leaves the rest in the lurch. AND HUAT LAH! These 'wonderful' humans pass their interviews and get their scholarships! (Is tt why Some JC have shitty teachers to 'guide' students?)

This is education system in Singapore. Something I'll never understand.
I'm sure there are merits to our education system, but i guess it's too insignificant to catch my attention. *searching-in-progress*
Call me whiner or anything you want, but these are just my views.
I just cannot tahan calling absorbing information and vommiting them out for exams as real intellectual ability. You just dun judge how smart someone is based on their results. You don't. You just don't. (refer to Albert Eistein case and etc)

That's all for now. (I could have posted more, but *yawn* judging from the time, I shall stop my criticism)

2011-07-27T21:53:00.003+08:00

Went Fort Canning Park Cos of CCA td with the Sot Sot!
Fun!~ (I ate leaves in the park!)
and oh! That's where 婚姻注册局 is!
Hahaha! Jaejung!<3

It was a pretty fun day with lots of laughing(:
I laughed till i felt so tired!(:

I'm rushing my EOM so that's all for now humans!

2011-07-26T20:12:00.005+08:00

{edited}

I'm sorry, maybe I'm just not the perfect understanding daughter u want.
I'm sorry for being rude and being a burden to the family.
I'll try my best to be the perfect daughter u want.
I'll try my best.